Growing pain!

No, I am really not referring to the obvious growing pains due to the pregnancy, but more to the emotional growing pains as one's life changes.

You know how sometimes you have those flashes of realization? Yesterday as I was walking home from work, I kept thinking how much my life has changed in the past 6 years. Moving across the world from Bucharest to Boston was a difficult thing. The hope and determination of going back to Romania each year kept me sane. And we did just so. We pretty much went back each year to visit my family and friends. But funny enough, each year was different. I think it took me a while to realize that life moved on and what I was holding onto were just memories of how things and life used to be in the past. Not only did I change, but so did my friends. So each year it was a little bit more of a bitter sweet experience.

Last night I realize that my desire of going back home each year is more than even a futile effort of holding onto something that doesn't exist anymore. Things had changed dramatically: my brother visits each year, my mom is getting ready to come and be with us for a while after the baby is born, some of my best friends moved away to different parts of the world. So, with growing pains, I have finally let go and accepted that it's ok for life to change! Are we never going to go back to Romania? No, of course we are going to go, but I am finally ok with not making it a point of going back each year. While I love my family dearly, I am finally ok with realizing that my life and family is here with A and the soon to come baby!

I can't even tell you what a world of possibilities this realization opened up for me. My mind is still spinning with all the options!

Later!